Today I turned fifty. I feel really good.
My body’s still working quite well thanks. (Touch wood!)
My hair’s not too grey, my wrinkles are few,
I can still touch my toes with my knuckles. (Can you?)
I’m quite full of vigour, just getting ripe.
(But they now print the phone book in much smaller type.)
My hearing’s still good. What’s that you say?
Being born was great for me,
Though I can’t recall the chore.
But every year I’m pleased to see,
That it’s me they all adore.
My mom and dad stay close to me;
They claim to know me well.
They’re proud to know a celebrity,
And me, I know they’re swell.
It’s your birthday, so don’t feel down;
Don’t think bad stuff and frown;
Your life should be filled with mirth;
Just look what you’ve done since your birth.
You started out really small,
Now you’re really filled out and tall.
In the beginning you would just cry,
Now you can laugh if you try.
It’s birthday time again I see;
Another year’s gone by.
We’re older than we used to be;
The thought could make me cry.
For getting older is not such fun,
When there’s hurting in your back,
And it’s agony if you have to run,
And a pleasure to lie in the sack.
Hey it’s your birthday
The time has come
It’s an important moment
Coming from the Bay
I got you a gift
You can’t figure it out
Please do me a favor
And work my midnight shift