Funny Sms - Humor
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Clouds r white but the sky is blue, monkey like u should b kept in the zoo, dont get angry ull find me there too,not in the cage but laughing at u. ha! ha! ha
A man can kiss his wife goodbye. A flower can kiss a butterfly.Wine can kiss a frosted glass.But u my friend can kiss my ass!
I tried to call you from a payphone last night. i put my doner card in by mistake, it cost me an arm and a leg!
Hi i am dying to c u, i want to talk to u seriously, but I cant get 2 u, dis stupid gatekeeper is asking me 4 a ticket to enter the zoo!
Hey can u do me a favour, take a pic of urself n send me it, i’m playin cards n i’m missin the joker!!
Funny Sms - Word Games
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Pls remind me 2 remind u about reminding me to send u dis reminder oh dat reminds me can u remind me wot the reminder was ive forgot!
Piss the taking is someone that realise u this like times at its! NOW READ IT BACKWARDS!!
Hello!Im a little alien called Ted.I have taken the form of a mobile phone- your phone.And during this message I have been having sex with your thumb!
This cat is cat a cat good cat way cat to cat keep cat a cat idiot cat buzy cat for cat 20 cat seconds cat! NOW READ IT WITHOUT SAYIN CAT!
A)Ur Attractive B)Ur Buff C)Ur Charmin D)Ur Delicious E)Ur Excitin F)Ur Funny G)Ur Gorgeous H)Ur Heavenly I)Im J)Just K)Kiddin L)Loser!
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Funny Sms - Wrong Person
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I saw sumthing in da shop window 2day.It was stunning sexy cute beautiful & adorable.I was supposed 2buy it4u till i realised it was my own REFLECTION
Those innocent eyes… Those kissable lips… A great smile… The perfect walk… Smoothest talk… Absolutely gorgeous.. Thats enough bout me-How r u?
You are Attractive Gorgeous Sexy Intelligent Smart Charming Sophisticated Fit Kind & Generous. In fact you are becoming more like me everyday!
wanted to send u something nice that would make u smile but the postman told me to get out of the mailbox!
This message was sent exclusively for the handsome and the beautiful. We have obviously sent it to the wrong number.We are truly sorry for the inconvenience
Ur cute gorgeous fine & dandy.really sexy u make me randy.ur good wiv ur mouth & also in bed oops sorry wrong number 4get wot I said!
Funny Sms - News Flash
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*NEWSFLASH* An independant study has proven dat those who have a bad sex life & who are crap in bed are readin dis message in their right hand!
*NEWSFLASH* A woman was found dead in her home 2day!She was discoverd in her bath tub which was filled with milk & conflakes.the police suspect a cerial killer!
*NEWSFLASH* Police r lookin 4 a suspect whos smart sexy witty & very gorgeous- they’ve already eliminated u from the enquiry (where do you think i shood hide?)
NEWFLASH tell all ur female m8s dat u can get 1000 tampons for �1.No strings attacthed but 4 limited period.Its a bloody good deal!
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Funny Sms - Police
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I m at the police station.The police caught me & filed a case against me “possession of good looks”.i’m doomed! i need someone ugly 2 bail me out-so hurry up!
i hereby place u under arrest 4 violating code 0569 - distracting public with ur xtreme good looks &sex appeal.remain silent & report 2 my bedroom…
I’m @ the police station now been done 4 drink driving.Urine sample was positive so I nicked the sample.they r now doin me 4 taking the piss..
Funny Sms - Reasons Y
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Y MEN R LIKE COMPUTERS 1)dey r useless until u turn dem on 2)dey have lots of data but r still clueless 3)as soon as u pick 1 a better model cums on the market!
Y WOMEN R LIKE COMPUTERS 1)no one really understands dem 2)all ur mistakes r stored in their memory 3)u find urself spendin all ur money on accessories for dem!
Y MEN R LIKE TOILETS 1)dey r always out of order 2)dey stink 3)the nice ones r always engaged 4)dey consume large amounts of liquid 5)r constantly full of crap
5 BAD THINGS 2 SAY 2 A NAKED GUY 1)so dis explains ur car! 2)but still work right? 3)r u cold? 4)shood i get a pump? 5)so i guess dis makes me d early bird!
4 REASONS Y DOGS R BETTER DAN WOMEN 1)dogs obey wen u shout at dem 2)dogs dont shop 3)u can giv away ur dogs children 4)any guy can get a good lookin dog!
3 REASONS Y CATS R BETTER DAN MEN 1)cats luv u wotever u look like 2)u can stroke a cat wivout it thinkin about sex 3)u dont mind wen ur cat chases after birds!
Funny Sms - Miscellaneous
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If U delete this message thats bcoz u love me. If u save it thats bcoz u desire me & if u ignore it thats bcoz u miss me. So what u gonna do with IT?
Theres an urgent meeting in the jungle! Everyones there.. lions, tigers, cheetas and ape, but the meetin cant start because the monkey is reading this text….
God made butter god made cheese god made you for me to squeeze god made whiskey god made pepsi and when he made you he made you SEXY!!
If a big fat man creeps into your bedroom one night and stuffs you into a bag, Then do not worry ’cause I told Santa I wanted you for christmas!!!!!
Smilin is infexous u catch it lik d flu.wen sum1 smild at me 2day i startd smilin 2.now im infectd iv sent it thru dis txt.so now ur smiling who wil it go2 next?