Finding Perfect Men
Posted on August 20, 2007 - Filed Under Short Funny Jokes | Leave a Comment
At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends.
“The man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He must be musical. Tell jokes. Sing. And stay home at night!”
An old granny overheard and spoke up, “Honey, if that’s all you want, get a TV!”
Bride and Broom
Posted on August 13, 2007 - Filed Under Short Funny Jokes | Leave a Comment
Two brooms were going to get married, before the ceromony, the bride broom said to the groom broom, “I think I’m going to have a whisk broom.” The groom broom said to the bride broom, “How can that be possible? we haven’t even swept together!”
Who is Superman
Posted on August 13, 2007 - Filed Under Short Funny Jokes | Leave a Comment
Jenny : Robin, do you know who is a Superman ?
Robin: Yes, I know.
Jenny : Who ?
Robin : The one who wears his underwear over his pants.
Bathing Suit Shopping
Posted on August 4, 2007 - Filed Under Short Funny Jokes | Leave a Comment
While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband’s advice.
“What do you think?” I asked. “Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?”
“Better get a bikini,” he replied. “You’d never get it all in one.”
Safest Way to Drive
Posted on August 1, 2007 - Filed Under Short Funny Jokes | Leave a Comment
Peter Ludwig, a caver from Austria who is appalled by American driving habits, offers the following advice:
The probability of being involved in a traffic accident is directly
proportional to time spent on the road. Driving fast decreases one’s exposure.
One third of traffic accidents are caused by drunk drivers; two thirds are caused by non-drunk drivers.
Therefore, the safest way to drive is drunk and VERY fast.
Believing in Santa
Posted on July 31, 2007 - Filed Under Short Funny Jokes | Leave a Comment
Christmas always sucked when I was a kid because I believed in Santa Clause. Unfortunately, so did my parents, so I never got anything!
My Dog
Posted on July 31, 2007 - Filed Under Short Funny Jokes | Leave a Comment
Having a dog is great, it’s just the ‘dog people’
that freak me out. “Oh, look at her, she’s precious,
just like Mommy.” Me?!? If I birthed something that had
8 nipples - it ain’t leaving the house.
Surgery
Posted on July 31, 2007 - Filed Under Short Funny Jokes | Leave a Comment
I had my appendix removed. There was nothing wrong with it.I just did it as a warning to the other organs in my body to shape up or they’re out of there.
