Funny Junk - Funny Pictures Videos and Jokes

Funny Japanese Phrases

Hello.
Konnichiwa. (kon-nee-chee-WAH)

How are you?
O-genki desu ka? (oh-GEN-kee dess-KAH?)

Fine, thank you.
Genki desu. (GEN-kee dess)

What is your name?
O-namae wa nan desu ka??(oh-NAH-mah-eh wah NAHN dess-KAH?)

Funny Phrases 1

About as useful as a Condom vending machine in the Vatican.

He’s that useless he couldn’t organise a piss up in a brewery.

She’s been up and down more times than a whore’s drawers.

She’s been engaged more times than a telephone switchboard!

He’s tighter than a photo finish.

He’s sweating more than a Dog in a restaraunt.

He’s got a head balder than a baby’s arse.

Funny St Patricks Day Sayings

Funny St Patricks Day Sayings Collection

“St. Patrick: one of the few saints whose feast day presents the opportunity to get determinedly whacked and make a fool of oneself all under the guise of acting Irish.”
Funny St Patricks Day Sayings by Charles M. Madigan

“Wretched excess is an unfortunate human trait that turns a perfectly good idea such as Christmas into a frenzy of last-minute shopping-or attaches the name of St. Patrick to the day of the year that bartenders fear most.”
Funny St Patricks Day Sayings by Jon Anderson

“In order to find his equal, an Irishman is forced to talk to God.”
Funny St Patricks Day Sayings by Stephen Braveheart

“The Irish are a fair people - they never speak well of one another.”
Funny St Patricks Day Sayings by Samuel Johnson
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Funny T Shirt Sayings

“Always remember you’re unique… Just like everyone else. ”

“I don’t have a license to kill. I have a learner’s permit.”

“Taxation WITH representation isn’t so hot, either!”

“Save the whales! Trade them for valuable prizes.”

“Stop repeat offenders. Don’t re-elect them!”

Funny Chuck Norris Quotes

Funny Chuck Norris Quotes Collection

“If you want to accomplish anything in life,
you can’t just sit back and hope it will happen.
You’ve got to make it happen.”
Funny Quotes by Chuck Norris

“Violence is my last option.”
Funny Quotes by Chuck Norris

“The philosophy of the martial arts makes
kids goal-oriented and makes
them feel like they have self-worth.
It’s been proven. I’ve seen it myself.”
Funny Quotes by Chuck Norris